It took time, but I finally got my thoughts down on paper - who Fabienne was, why she meant so much to me, and why I still miss her so. It has been a very healing experience. Thank you, everyone, for sharing your memories as well!
Just posting a few paragraphs from there. I'm sure many of us can relate to them, and I would love to hear thoughts/ additions from anyone else still experiencing the sense of loss.
"Fabienne is a role model to me – in manners, culture, knowledge of her craft, lighteartedness, leadership. She could have lived in luxury, but bravely chose a life of uncertainty as an artist and entrepreneur. She could have catered to modern tastes, but somehow lifted us – her customers - to her level. She could have stayed content with mixing scents that were “in”, but she created something entirely new – a philosophy and treatise expressed in perfume, without calling it such. And she made all this seem effortless.
But [the pain] is more than that. It is the existential sadness of knowing that the world lost a nontrivial source of wisdom. It is also a sense of injustice – that someone born to create beauty and to fill others with joy must face death. Finally, a selfish sense of personal loss – looking at her creations and knowing that there will never be another; that she will never recommend another book to me; will never send me another scent named after my showcase dance.
To paraphrase Hamlet’s words, 'Fabienne was a lady, take her for all in all. I shall not look upon her like again.' "
I have posted the full thing on LiveJournal, in case anyone wants to relive more Fabienne stories or, like me, needs help getting closure. Stay strong!
http://jivequeen87.livejournal.com/604.html
and what if Fabienne retires or runs away with a traveling museum exhibit and never runs another retrour? to backup bottle, or to gamble and try the many new smells? that is the difficult choice one faces here in possetland."
so lovely too. We miss you Fabienne